Author: Beyza Ozer

Beyza Ozer is a 19 year old journalism and poetry student at Columbia College. They are the author of i'd rather be watching buffy rn and the social media coordinator for The Lettered Street Press. They can also be found on Twitter and Tumblr.

an apology in the form of a poem

1.) admit
i pour salt into your stretch marks
you sit on my bedroom floor & ask
are you sure she’s not just a friend
i can’t give you an honest answer
or one you’ll like so i cry
i’m sorry, i’m sorry, i’m sorry
you stand up without a word & turn
your feet towards the door
you walk out & you don’t
look back

2.) cope
few exchanges of love & happiness
are exchanged the next three years
between us even though we live
under the same roof
i hear your creaking footsteps
pace back & forth in the dark blanket
of night across the hall
you are pale & fragile & your eyes have
lost their spark
you are nothing but a ghost in my
mother’s clothing

3.) suffer
the summer of unrequited love
brings about your own
for translucent orange bottles
rattling of the white pills ring in my
ears & the bags under your eyes become
too heavy to lift your head up
the car that takes you away grows a
devilish grin on its bumper &
there is no blood but
i know you wanted there to be
i have nothing else for you now
i failed to match your
dreams of perfection & i failed you &
i’m sorry, i’m sorry, i’m sorry.

i was a professional tennis player at age 17

i’ll stare in the mirror for a little while
right before
take off the sunglasses
two types of
trauma: loneliness &
being alone in a whitewashed
bathroom where the slightest
tint of red would glow
thanks bukowski
i can take it from here
pill bottles i stole from my
mother’s cabinet with shaking hands
where is my damn 40
smash it to pieces before
i’m finished this way
i have a pen for my stationary
red ink on my hands
all over the sink
i forgot the note
heaven & hell play tug of war
with my aching arms
slowly falling asleep
i’ll write it when i wake up

(a lack of) original thought

once i read a snapple cap that said half of all snapple
“real facts” are actually fake
229 facts
114.5 is half of 229
how can you have half of a fact?
#171: “the most sensitive parts of the body are
the mouth and fingertips” but
eyeballs have more nerve endings which is far less romantic because i can’t
touch your eyeballs so what’s the point? i am chicago winters and you
are raynaud’s disease. my brain is tangled christmas lights. you are
blue hypergiant star. i am cigarette smoke and you are purple knees. you think
human error is dirty talk and i’m every renounced snapple fact.

no one belongs here more than you

beyza ozer