Author: Tammara Nassar

Tammara Nassar is soft and difficult and careening but thinks the world looks like it's trying to stay. Her work has been published in we're here, we're queer, and we probably love too hard zine and her forthcoming chapbook, giving birth at Qalandia. She can also be found on Twitter and Tumblr.


every time
I try to write a poem
about you
I end up writing a poem
to you
and it goes right past you.
someone tell him how to feel.
bombs above us,
skies above bombs,
tell him how to feel.
I heard you’re the same everywhere,

when I try to not think about your name
I think about the piece of land
you sleep on
most days of the year
and when I read the news especially
you have a different name,
Qatar pledges its full support for Egypt and I
become far, far, far
on colonized land
all the same.

it’s a self-regulatory
I have developed over the past two years
to avoid love
all together.

even our geographies resist,
proving that
you’re almost an island
& I am cold as fuck
& god is a capitalist asshole
who cares not
about the cancerous distance
island waters
& frozen blood.

you are the brother Karamazov you are all of the brothers Karamazov I said you are all of the brothers Karamazov

everyone I meet helps me
write about you especially
when they write their lovers’
names on cigarette smokes
but I never write your
name on cigarette smokes
(I do not think of you
when cigarettes smoke)
I only write your name
in a language
on solicited people;
they are all blood suckers

and blood is thick

and water is bottomless
but skin is beautiful
and smoke disappears.